July 2006: AquaSub Newfoundland Adventure to Bell Island with Ocean Quest of CBS (Conception Bay South, not the network you assholes).
There are many lessons to be learned from the Ocean Quest dive adventure in Newfoundland, the dive experience itself notwithstanding. For instance our first morning we learned how sparse and cruel life can be for those who have to live on the Rock. Holly Stanley, the proprietor's daughter, graciously cooked us maggot omelets. Waste not, want not.
We all have heard that Newfoundlanders die because of the severe weather and heavy seas that can kick up in a millisecond. On our first day we experienced a bit of this weather and we will speak no more of this travail. But then something miraculous happened. It appeared that continental drift, driven by accelerated plate tectonics, went into high gear and we now appear to be located somewhere near the equator. The smell of roasting human flesh was wafting through the boat between dives while the group marinated themselves in sunscreen on the second and third days of the dive trip. Humpback whales breaching off the bow was the backdrop to this Club Med experience.
The tragedy of life and death is part of this dive experience as one is reminded of the sailors whose gargantuan WWII watery graves we have been visiting for the past three days. As if by a decree from some higher power, these steel tombs are in such pristine condition that, with a bit of work, could be brought back into service. There are four ships but the Rose Castle succinctly sums up the experience of the whole. From the Marconi radio room at 80 feet to the un-detonated torpedo at 150 feet there is an unexcelled dive experience for all levels expertise. These wrecks are nearly 500 feet long and 70 feet wide, upright, fully intact, and still strewn with the detritus of their missions and final battle with the U-boats; clothing, ammunition, rigging, and bones. Pick one of these wrecks and a week of exploration could be done without re-finning ground. This is the only place on earth where you can see farther underwater than on the land. You can damn near see to Toronto from the deck of the Saganaga 70 feet under. But you need sonar to find your car in a parking lot.
Just as the weather builds character the water temperature teaches us something about the human condition. It has become obvious that all dry suit divers have a tendency toward obsessive compulsive behavior in their quest to keep the elements out which is a battle that cannot be won, no matter how much duct tape you deploy. There is no cure for this psychological disorder, these divers must be treated with compassion and understanding. I have been diving wet and am not particularly well endowed with natural insulation. Long before I succumb to hypothermia I will die of the incessant ribbing from those who think they have conquered the Second Law of Thermodymanics with dry suits. Enthalapy (delta G) moves from higher energy state to lower, there is no stopping it and you too will freeze. Bottom temperature ranges from 30 – 45 F and is very near bath water at the safety stop.
As for the lodge, and dive shop crew; there are no skeeven angishores here (reference Dictionary of Newfoundland English). The Stanley family, skippers Bob and Arthur, and the rest of the staff at your service day and night. The lodge and all its furniture is built from pristine Newfoundland spruce that Rick Stanley, the CEO of this operation, had his wife Debbie and daughters Jillian and Holley hew out of the local wilderness. Women do the men's work here! Washers, dryers, internet in every room, and a computer at your disposal are all part of the conveniences. Nitrox, trimix, and a bottle of nitrous oxide for a feel good if you are not inclined to Screech which is very cheap for both men and women. Name your price!
And the food; we pressed into service the magnificent Barbie on the front deck and scraped whatever meat we could find off the Trans Canada Highway. Somehow a couple of Atlantic salmon and a few dozen lobsters managed to get themselves run over by a pick-up truck. We did not have to spend a bloody double-loony. And jesus, mary, and joseph; and all the saints in heaven and bloody martyrs in purgatory: Rob Geddis, damn near burnt our guts out with the most delicious death sauce ever invented by the South Africans, which is amazing since I didn't know there was food in Africa.
Our dive master and trip organizer, Norbert Pietkiewicz of AquaSub, has very little time for hobbies but in his spare moments he bench presses old Russian subs. On the other hand, Ron Irvine, benched pressed the Lord Strathcona filled with iron ore just to piss off the Pollack. Tom Wilson, the cool hand Luke of diving and his undercover Russian mastermind Vlada, kept them under control. Not a person could feel uncomfortable diving with this motley crew of dive professionals, especially during wreck penetrations because Norbert and Ron could bend steel to save you. Norbert is Polish and Ron is a Hoser, what else would one expect.
Andrea Novak saved Tom Covey from the Abyss three times. His daughter, Morgan, thanks you Andrea. Tom English and Luci English were the only civilized people in the group, although I'm still trying to figure out where Luci, with her beautifully cadenced speech, is from. Glenn Ford inspired us all, older than Moses, he not only could heave more double tanks than a 30 year old, he could cook one hell of a deep fried road kill (NewFie turkey).
Regards;
Andrea and SubZero
"....Live to Dive and Dive to Live...." 
. Visibility around 50 feet and water temperature 32 F at depth and around 40 F at the surface. Today the weather is good and we are getting ready for our second day of diving.
